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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Blu-ray Review

By Rachel Cericola

The Film

"Four years of journalism school so I can do that?"

At some point, Whoopi Goldberg had to be turning down films. The EGOT winner got a little bit of crap for getting an Oscar for Ghost, but she certainly has a career and acting chops (see: The Color Purple). Now, she spends her days on The View and her nights cameoing in such fine films as Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

She's to this movie what Vanilla Ice was to the 1990 film -- and I'm pretty sure no one wants that on their resume.

However, it's really unfair to be bashing Whoopi so much, because she is barely a blip in this film. And believe it or not, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles looks a lot worse on paper than it does on the big screen.

The movie is surprisingly okay, but doesn't go much beyond that. I would prefer to see the Turtles get a kick-ass animation effort, but Michael Bay's movie factory can't turn out animation. (He serves as a producer.) Hell, it can barely churn out movies, making Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles kind of a surprising treat.

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Megan Fox finds a connection with the "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles." Photo: Paramount Pictures.

Of course, I'm using the word "treat" pretty loosely here, because really it's the treat equivalent of a Pop-Tart. It's tasty enough, but kind of familiar and also a bit forgettable.

After a very public feud, Megan Fox is back on Bay's payroll as April, a budding reporter seeking something beyond her usual fluff pieces. Whoopi is her boss and Will Arnett is a semi-obsessed co-worker. April spends her spare time trying to track the Foot Clan, a group that's terrorizing the city. However, it turns out that the Turtles are the real story -- one that's she's having a tough time producing.

Fox, the patron saint of bad movies, does her best -- and if you've seen any of her movies, you probably know what that entails. It's hard to fault her though, because really, no one should allow her to carry a film. Her blank stares certainly don't help matters, but the movie is lacking info about Shredder (why so angry and spiky, dude?) and the Turtles in general. Yes, as disturbing as they appear (and they are disturbing), I wanted more Turtles. Instead, it's hard to differentiate who is who, except that one is voiced by Johnny Knoxville (he's Leonardo!). After all, weaving April's connection to the Turtles in with constant reminders of her hotness, all of the bad one-liners, and a bit of origin really leaves little room for the action. And that's a shame, since it's really where the film excels. That final snow-covered chase is a nice payoff, but it takes insanely long to get there.

Also worth mentioning is that this film casts William Fichtner as (surprise!) the bad guy. He plays that role so well. I just wish he got to do it in a few better movies, because I really enjoy him in everything he does.

As far as where this film stands in a long line of TMNT legacy, I like to think of it as a placeholder. Fans will either love or hate Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but they will see it -- and probably the three sequels scheduled to follow, which will hopefully pack in more action and maybe a bit about the Turtles themselves.

The Picture

The film may not be all that awesome, but it's certainly a nice little piece of eye candy -- and I'm not even talking about all of the Megan Fox. The colors are bright and the details are sharp on this 2.40:1 image. Megan Fox's face is very porcelain-like, in both color and texture. At times, she looks even less realistic than the Turtles, but she looks pretty darn gorgeous overall. The scenery is equally impressive, whether above ground or in the sewer. Flying snow looks fun, and the Turtles -- well, they're just downright creepy. There's no other way to describe talking reptiles with ginormous body-builder-type bodies. However, every scale and pore is pretty fun to ogle here.

The Sound

Cowabunga! Paramount has delivered a Dolby Atmos track with this release. If you have the setup to enjoy it, it may be worth this movie's purchase price. Everyone else won't exactly be disappointed with the Dolby TrueHD 7.1 track; the film sounds just as good as it looks. Dialogue is always crystal clear, but there are a ton of atmospheric sounds going on. Thunder, rain, clanging chains, breaking glass, and much more fill the surrounds to make this an immersive experience. However, when the Turtles work their magic, the track really shines. Whether they're flying through the air or throwing punches underground, there's a lot of great directionality in this track. It just makes you appreciate (and long for) all of the action-packed moments even more.

Our editor has a Dolby Atmos rig at home and will add notes about the Atmos portion of this track soon, so watch this space.

The Extras

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With so much franchise to cover, the extras section seems a little slim. Everything included is really designed for the extremely short attention span. There's a piece on the score, a few minutes with the cast, a featurette on the 3D version (which we didn't receive for review), a music video, and a making-of that music video. Two longer shorts (around 15 minutes each) stand out as the best of the bunch, covering the film, turtles, and turtle weapons.

Final Thoughts

I really wanted to love Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. No really; I wanted it to be something I could share with my 8-year-old, and possibly use as a springboard to get him into the comic books, cartoons and even the toys. He'd probably enjoy the fart jokes, but the rest is sort of meh. If you can get over the turtles "evolved" appearance, the movie doesn't have enough character development or action. The AV is incredible, but the story is not. TMNT is best left underground -- for now, anyway.

Product Details

  • Actors: Megan Fox, Will Arnett, William Fichtner, Alan Ritchson, Noel Fisher, Pete Ploszek, Jeremy Howard, Danny Woodburn, Johnny Knoxville, Tony Shalhoub, Whoopi Goldberg
  • Director: Jonathan Liebesman
  • Audio/Languages: Dolby Atmos (English), Dolby Digital 5.1 (French, Portuguese, Spanish), DVS 2.0 (English)
  • Subtitles: English, English SDH, French, Portuguese, Spanish
  • Aspect Ratio: 2.40:1
  • Number of Discs: 2
  • Rating: PG-13
  • Studio: Paramount Pictures
  • Blu-ray Disc Release Date: December 16, 2014
  • Run Time: 101 minutes
  • List Price: $39.99
  • Extras:
    • Digital Reality
    • In Your Face! The Turtles in 3D
    • It Ain't Easy Being Green
    • Evolutionary Mash-Up
    • Turtle Rock
    • Extended Ending
    • "Shell Shocked" Music Video
    • Making of "Shell Shocked"
    • Standard-Def DVD
    • Digital Copy
    • UltraViolet Digital Copy

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