Ironically, it's an advance in technology that makes "TF3" more bearable than 2009's "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen": 3D technology, that is. The new format makes it necessary for Mr. Bay to ease back on the jittery jumpcutting that made "TF2" so epilepsy-inducing. Still, in "Dark of the Moon", Mr. Bay is otherwise given carte blanche to indulge in the worst of his trademark excesses: overblown action, long running-times and pointless dialogue punctuated by lingering leers at female models.
In this case, the non-CGI object of Mr. Bay's attention is British model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, picking up where Megan Fox left off. After two installments, Ms. Fox is not only persona non grata, but she is the victim of one or two none-too-subtle jabs (one 'bot offers of Sam's previous gf: "I didnt like her, she was mean"). Despite a complete lack of chemistry with Mr. LaBeouf, Ms. Huntington-Whiteley acquits herself as well as possible, being called upon to do little more than pout and run in stilettos without breaking anything.
For those of you keeping track, "TF3" opens with an audacious setup involving the first moon landing, a cameo by Buzz Aldrin, and a historical recreation featuring a disturbingly poor JFK lookalike. The film then picks up with Sam desperately seeking job a interview. He, like the audience, is stunned at his lack of prospects since, well, he saved the human race not once but twice. You'd think the government might hook him up. Apparently not. The scenes of Sam's plight are full of the worst kind of rapid-fire banter. And it brings to light an inherent problem with series: there is not a single character to root for. Literally, the only likable character is Optimus Prime and he is consistently waylaid by plot contrivances only to show up at the last minute and save the day (that device gets old fast).
Even an impressive parade of guest stars can't save "TF3". And I'm talking about John Turturro, reprising his role as a simpering conspiracy theorist, John Malkovich (you read that right) as a wacky corporate bigwig, and even Frances McDormand as a hardnosed CIA vet. Yes, this is a "Transformers" movie that contains the credit: "...and Frances McDormand".
It's almost fascinating to see how a film with this much action could be so dull. But somewhere along the way, Mr. Bay, and apparently screenwriter Ehren Kruger, forgot a key point about action movies: the action should drive the story. Without that, it's all noise. Literally, an entire action sequence, set in a collapsing skyscraper, could have been cut wholesale with no loss to the film.
Still, I can't see why there wouldn't be another "Transformers" movie in the near future. At least, as long as these robots keep performing their best special effect: the ability to transform celluloid into cash.
| Movie title | Transformers: Dark of the Moon |
|---|---|
| Release year | 2011 |
| MPAA Rating | PG-13 |
| Our rating | |
| Summary | This third installment in the noisy, interminable, and in-all-ways robotic series is not quite as unforgivably bad as the last one, but that doesn't make it good. |
